Quitting jobs
Everyone has a job they don’t like and whenever someone complains about the job that they do, there’s always are going to be handfuls of people saying “QUIT UR JOB!” not really caring about whether it’ll benefit the complainer or not.
Quitting a job cold is one of the dumbest things you can do when you do not have any safety nets. No savings. No jobs lined up. Nothing planned. You are putting yourself back to a place of uncertainty and it’s not pleasant when that countdown starts. That countdown is tied to how much you have left to cover your expenses fully until you get another job and how long those expenses will pile up.
Because all it takes is one or two missed paychecks to upset your financial stability and the system you’ve made in how you pay for things.
For some people, unfortunately, quitting jobs is not as simple of an option. People are just jammed into where they are because their job market is poor or it’s highly competitive even when they went to college for that job.
Maybe not poor at its core, but poor phrasing nonetheless: “just be yourself!”
What we should say is: stop trying to force yourself to fit in. You are enough as you are. Embrace your quirks, passions, and individuality without feeling the need to conform to what others expect. It’s not about “just being yourself” in a vacuum; it’s about freeing yourself from the pressure to mold into something you’re not.
The beauty of authenticity is in the courage to show up as you are, without apology.
You still need to follow your society’s expected behaviors. Like showering or wearing shoes in public venues.
A big problem is people not picking up certain queues and being ostracized then continuing to follow “be yourself.” It’s a downward spiral.
The retort to that is, “be yourself, unless you’re and arsehole, then be someone else”
You can add “annoying” to that as well. In my case I’ve had the uncanny ability to regurgitate the most useless trivia about almost any subject that I’ve read about. It took me longer than I care to admit to realize that no one wants to hear that shit.
You know who take this advice too seriously? Assholes.
This also depends on the society you are living in. Good luck with “being yourself” in north korea, or even any east asian countries.
“Fitting in is one of the greatest barriers to belonging. Fitting in is about assessing a situation and becoming who you need to be in order to be accepted. Belonging, on the other hand, doesn’t require us to change who we are; it requires us to be who we are.” -Brené Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection
All one liner advice is a shortening of a much more complex idea and people rarely pass along the complexity. I think you nailed the goal of the saying, that fitting in shouldn’t require losing their individuality.
Sadly some people use the saying to justify being an asshole, because they don’t understand that they can be a decent person and still be themselves.
I think “Just be the best version of yourself” is a better phrasing.
Not sure I like the word “just” though. Not as empowering as it could be.
This is pretty good advice, and something I often need to remind myself of. The word “just” weakens what you’re saying and is usually superfluous. Delete it.
I really like this answer! Absolutely gorgeous response. Confidence is massively important for being happy with oneself, and that starts by understanding you are a singular original human.