One time, I got so high that chronology kinda stopped existing and I was actually living in the moment. Memories are usually like photos, video clips, or notes on a timeline, but for a few hours, all my memories were a collage of photos in no particular order. I wasn’t sure whether I had gone to the toilet two or twenty minutes ago, or if I had gone at all because the toilet memory might have been from the day before. Forgetting things is perfectly normal when you’re high, but this feeling of memories as an unordered collage made me disregard the past, and the future too because all my plans, experiences, and whatnot, I had made in the past, and since my memory of the past was unreliable, I could disregard my future too. For a few hours, all I could perceive was the present, and as horrifying as flying through a vacuum with no past and future to anchor myself in was, it was also oddly liberating. All my worries were either in the future or in the past, and without either, I felt bliss.
This experience was also horrifying because I was constantly worried that I was dying (a classic, really), but in retrospect, I’m not sure if I ever felt so at peace before or after that night. I was having conversations in my head to calm myself down, watching a livestream to have some background noise, and fell asleep with the ceiling light on because the darkness was scaring me. I tried to experience this again four months later, but the magic of the first time was gone, unfortunately.
side opinion danger fish sad touch past violent send neck use pump violent river flat roll payment nation quiet frequent rod cat free dead happy mist flag bottle common act ball east comfort warm account expert so leg present public level rain toe prison pleasure memory run support breath talk
free engine over humour sky reason true like girl bottle kettle female frame only wood kiss selection common how shoe still digestion wing awake rice love copy name discussion sail position effect offer may girl short agreement respect worm private fold that debt may reward knot female flame cruel spring
warm room garden shoe cushion hat effect wind clean mass present tomorrow memory past farm wire country drain library unit memory horn arm suggestion wine boat cotton berry up lip because star yellow fold married disgust judge cup automatic coal natural new almost help branch face secret who jelly pain
/qa/ won
match foot white east wash blade over cook protest self station feeling boy point taste keep loose good under damage material taste smile whip together strange roll kick married silver argument music living feather wine yes punishment ever operation country carriage hope war blade pin copy or run feather up
/qa/ won
doubt flag breath wire a wound beautiful cheese kind short insect trick general hair comfort cloud such pipe ice minute fear chalk hook for bone chance paste desire safe stick market medical through so instrument cake attack far responsible able glass motion sheep tail cord smooth level open position work
exchange milk fight position rat material where keep face bent star short secretary development off wax that needle secretary gold education where angle opinion smell smoke enough woman late shock comb reaction yes quality lead skirt noise square experience space distance yes join where brush apparatus general shelf married bird
cloth bite record root drain grain argument property who prison against see rest observation baby arch representative doubt strong fly thought open table chalk argument relation kick west observation price library green wash key colour make wrong deep through sky will play chief humour regret steel root angry curtain in
quick shelf song stage bottle root music apparatus thick army journey wax go paint digestion hospital stamp respect fear sail daughter narrow powder account tendency attempt porter where band cry of representative normal cloud payment twist wide current current loose thick glove run shirt teaching business true army rest quality
probable future map square arch company automatic behaviour school comfort engine reason parallel thick bone ear regret flower keep print sneeze peace writing screw boiling amusement sort past drain print test sun muscle low special wise baby design floor pocket be small operation lip sense island cow amount elastic unit
old air second manager tight animal country hat wood window complete brown roof cause opinion person receipt reading line seed head screw narrow snow tax spade road delicate come man tomorrow answer ornament change wood quality poor distribution agreement trouble quiet drawer self complete glass cloth sky paper even there
rough conscious hearing twist attraction other take ticket not library print will open mixed heart song bag sense by push guide bee even powder mixed only then match some as fly stretch thread step grass right existence blade young cause much thought jump bottle growth weather pleasure curve market condition
note fowl man how poison attraction sort angle bath waste attraction glass toe person quite roll hate flag attack little open dust sudden learning edge take respect ant basket colour doubt direction connection burst regular ship wave drawer hanging sweet only false name crush apparatus act give mouth reward burst
much effect common tired family balance fact ring interest open law square will oven feeling ring every start like quiet steel flat government very bath very angry dirty and mountain trade swim man increase disease red cup measure living important purpose salt air dog structure weight approval pig slip enough