“Yeah, I play en passant all the time. It’s probably one of my strong points”

“Must be a hacker, they can’t move like that”

Haha, got me there

A fucking loser with no personality or opinions of their own

Cooking. Took a tray out of the oven and put in on the top. Turned to grab a spatula and caught the edge of the tray with the loose end of the oven glove.

As it slid off the top my dumb ass quickly grabbed for it with my ungloved hand, missed, and just pressed the searing hot tray into my stomach and thighs.

Two pies on the floor, that while I was whimpering in the cold shower upstairs, the dog ate.

Desperate to smear him with any and all accusations.

You people are supposed to be fighting each other! Red hat, blue hat remember!? No, no don’t look up! Stop that!

That’s why you should all do one each.

Arms Manufacturers:

“If we pray hard enough then God will swoop down from heaven and raise your salary”

In his mugshot they put him in a vest reserved for people who are a suicide risk. He is definitely going to get Epsteined

Here ya go. Just a little starter

This is less to do with the perceived quality of trans troops and more to do with making sure that the the current target of the boot doesn’t know how to fight back.

About time

Why don’t they just wait until Trump is sworn in and then he can use it to save America, right? Right?

Rod of animal control: it only works on dogs and it only makes them follow you and perform basic actions like sit and give paw.

On closer inspection it’s just a chew treat

It will be eaten if the dog gets a hold of it

"But what if we try to stop destroying the planet and someone else keeps making more profits by continuing to do so?! How is that fair on our shareholders?

How are we supposed to keep increasing our revenue under those conditions? I don’t think you are thinking about what’s really important here"

Yeah, but those missiles in the ocean were THREATENING people who have MONEY. The Palestinian children don’t have any money.

So I’m sure you can see the conundrum here for world leaders

(/s. Just in case, hard to know these days)

Ah yeah, it’s always after I pop a Nytol that I start getting fascist thoughts and feel compelled to broadcast them to the world.

But you know, at least the sheriff’s office has his back. I know my employer wouldn’t tolerate me posting messages about using my job to selectively target our customers based on their political leanings. Which is good for him I suppose.

Imagine talking about great RPG companions and not mentioning Knights of the Old Republic

We just keep having the largest most destructive storms and floods in years, and some people still claim this is totally normal and nothing we can do about it.

And those people are massive cunts