One of my favorite dark jokes is:

What does a box of chocolates and your crazy ex-girlfriend have in common?

They’ll both kill your dog

Two of my favorites are Kyle Kinaine and Dave Stone

I was on the way home Sunday with my kid. Going down a road that’s 30mph. My house is on the left. I run my blinker on to turn into my driveway. A BMW speeds up and tries to pass on my left. Nearly T-Boned me. All I saw was the medallion and a lit-up UBER sign on the dash.

They managed to stop, flip me off, and sped away before I could even get my window down. What the fuck is thier issue?

As someone who lives in TX and thinks my state/federal leadership is dumb AF. Yes, they want it. Having a SCOTUS who will play similarly dumb AF is a bonus to them.

Trump (2 weeks after everything all the experts said would happen happens): Noun one knew how complicated banking is… my uncle, the MIT professor; huege brain was surprised this happened. An MIT professor didn’t think this could happen; speaking of things that happen, Batron… where is Batron? Where is, possibly, my “favorite” son? The crypto visionary. Let me tell you about the importance of crypto. Did you know this stuff is mined? Like from the earth? More valuable than water it is. Looking to back the usd by crypto and then by water. It’s free it just drops from the sky like “Bing, Bing Bing bing” might as well as be kaching!!

They have concepts of a plan. The real plan will be out in 2 weeks, give or take. If you ask about it, the timer starts over.

If a “raise” doesn’t even cover inflation, it’s not a raise.

Edit: The best raises I’ve ever received were from leaving a job to a new job

Every company I’ve worked at sends these surveys out and says they are “anonymous”. I never respond to them.

1. If they are truly anonymous, why does my boss personally call me out to respond to them? I know it may track if you have submitted the survey. If it has that capability, then it can track you.

2. I don’t want a “moral boosting” pizza party. Give me more time off or more pay.

There will be Milk and Cookies

Gangs of North Pole

I like to remind people that businesses are not the best way to run a government.

The government imposes the rules business need to follow. I seasiously doubt business would have stopped child labor, insisted on workers’ safety, or minimum wage, without the government being there being rules that need to enforce the rules.

If the boot licking workers want to experience what this would be like. Go to Asia and get a job at any manufacturing site, and you’ll be at your “dream job”

Trumps next big idea. Starts at 9 seconds

Here is the 1min 16sec club that has them so triggered!

How do these people even walk without a backbone

I read the next thought as Jean-Ralphio singing, “Now with no rabies!!!”

What can he really do. Not play them in “the big game”? GTFO of here you sack of Florida shit

Butt-head taps underage girls, then show DOJ pictures of him doing so

MAGA: the terrifs will pay for themselves

I can’t wait to see the trumpers argue, “They are repealing Obama care, not the ACA. The ACA is great and works well. I use it personally. Obamacare is such a mess.”

The whole Twitter posting reads like a child who thinks they did their homework right.

I sure would like to see a FARA investigation into him now.

You mean like the practice of handing out water, watm beverages, and sometimes snacks to people stuck in long waiting likes to vote in mostly southern and majority, minority districts. If only giving a $1 bottle of water away for free was nearly as bad as giving away $1,000,000 to potential voters.