They literally scan your ID when you buy green in my state. They already know who you are and where you live. The cameras are to keep people honest (intimidated).

Front left: cigarettes and lighter

Front right: Keys, handkerchief

Back left: phone

Back right: wallet

Leg left side: 10 in 1 screwdriver

Right leg side: ballpoint pen, sharpie, white marker, mini vise-grips.

“The children yearn for the mines” -some goofball

Sucks when you want to play “that game” but the updates are gonna take another 20 minutes to download and install…by then I’ve lost my “that game” boner.

I never bother when the dm asks for a stealth check when playing an unstealthy character.

Just go along with the idea that I’m gonna get hurt to alay the detection of my comrades…

Dm: roll a stealth check.

Me: Wtf is a stealth check? I barge into the room like a bull whos balls are bound, sword drawn, heated breath, blood boiling.

He has got a cp dungeon somewhere. Only a matter of time before it surfaces…

You don’t win CoC…best you can hope for is to lose less.

In the future, you have to subscribe to use your specific genes. No choice in the matter because you were born with them, but big pharma owns the rights to those same genes.

Lizardman needs to get its skinsuit refitted…

Bet he has a cp dungeon…

“Take your baby aspirin and multivitamin then get on with your day…cause it’s all downhill from here.”

Is my morning mantra…

High Ground

Whats Left

Red N’ Blue

Spin Kick

One and Done

They are both wrong. The prophet is Paul Muad’dib Atreides…Long live Muad’dib. Bi lal kaifa!

COVID sucks. Counting my blessings that Ive never caught it. Every single one of my coworkers and their families had it. But they also don’t know how viruses and bacteria operate either.

They habitually stick their philangies in all of their facial orifices without regard for what they may have touched earlier…

Love that movie…

Anything cosmological or having to do with the quantum realm.

90% of the mainstream media oversimplifies or just plain gets things wrong for sensationalism and profits.

Holding out for a Hero by Bonnie Tyler. Crank that shit cause I’m the hero tonight!

One of the best things about being adult, you can eat your dessert before dinner.

Had a manager try jargon speak on me. He heard it in meetings and thought it sounded smart.

I dispelled him of that illusion.

“Use real words boss. Save that crap for the people who like to talk a lot and tell you nothing.”

Didn’t get a raise, but he started being way more lenient. Always been a Kings Fool.

Food…I like cuisine. Requires eating out. I find a place, don’t care about the cost. Try something I’ve never had. It can get expensive.