I’m never gunna attract the worm :'(

it’s Colby jack, burn it at the stake

oh man. the Susan Boyle craze. simpler times

more like why do I have 47,348 indeed job alerts even though I’ve repeatedly blocked them and flagged as spam

The difference is a medical professional likely has more money to get by with as they make a career change, an underpaid delivery driver loses their job, they can be out on the streets with no shelter, food, or clean water in just a few weeks.

wait, they don’t come from egg plants?

bro relax it’s just burrito tape

Years ago I received a promotion after just a month of starting and one dude started spreading rumors about me to get me fired, claiming he was more deserving of the position since he had been there longer. But he was only there because they were so short staffed that even someone such as himself who’d do a day’s worth of work over the course of a week couldn’t be fired without screwing up everybody else’s schedules. I referred some friends and once they were hired he was out the door. Hit me up on LinkedIn about a month later asking for a reference. There are some serious clowns out there.

I pulled my bed out to grab something that fell behind, forgot to push it back, turned off my light and went to lay down. Stubbed my pinky toe into the leg of the bed frame so hard that I broke two metatarsal. I already had arthritis and tendonitis along with an as of yet diagnosed neurological condition. It ended my welding career and made most general labor positions impossible, and with no office or administrative experience, I’m at a tremendous loss and now navigating the nightmare that is qualifying for disability assistance in the US with no insurance and no money for a doctor to get the proper medical records.

sounds like a challenge

Geez I don’t know, maybe it’s because tobacco is wildly more toxic and carcinogenic. Maybe it’s because tobacco causes hundreds of thousands of deaths every year. Or perhaps it’s because tobacco is loaded with thousands of equally as toxic additives. Just spit balling here.

drills hole in exhaust

grrr I’m a race car

in the restaurant we call this break time, the one on your head helps absorb the smell of your cigarette smoke, while the one on the bottom soaks up the swamp ass

this is why I always wear my inflatable buttplug to social gatherings

my toes are now bluer than they were before. did I miss a step?

how’s

I just used an M80 and some gauze

actually it’s filled with small virtual particles called deez and antideez that spontaneously annihilate my testicles

beltalowda!

damn all I got is frozen chicken tenders, I think we may have something here