• IninewCrow@lemmy.ca
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    7 days ago

    Flattening also means that you can thaw the beef quicker when you want to cook … and in terms of body parts, it’s better to use a barrel of acid to dissolve the evidence.

    • BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works
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      7 days ago

      Don’t use an acid for mammalian necromass. I hear that NaOH should be a good degreaser…

      That or pigs apparently. If you already have the body in parts, don’t put in the freezer for your mom locate. I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies’ digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don’t want to go sievin’ through pig shit, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, “as greedy as a pig”.

      Actually, you could let the pigs it all, lock, stock, and barrels, and then use a healthy dose of lye (that’s the NaOH from before) to treat the pigs’ shit for any left over solids. I’m not much of a chemist, but I do reckon that you’re left with any identifiable pieces after that ordeal.

    • shalafi@lemmy.world
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      7 days ago

      How do you feel about lye? Seems to clean the organic crap better. For metal I use sulfuric. ?

      • BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works
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        7 days ago

        Have you tried sulfuric acid on organic matter? Found some H2SO4 when I was a kid and began pouring it on stuff. Plants and chicken shit were really good for an orange cloud… Don’t stand down wind