Context, I’m 30 now and i will find women my age and up attractive, but 15 years ago a 35 year old women would never have been attractive to me.

As I’ve aged younger women are less and less attractive (thankfully)

But when I’m 60 will 60 year old women be attractive to me?

  • ∟⊔⊤∦∣≶@lemmy.nz
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    261
    arrow-down
    8
    ·
    1 year ago

    It’s personal preference, but basically edge limits that increase over time, like at 15 you’re looking at ±6 months, at 20 it might be + or - 1 or 2 years. At 30 you’re probably at looking at 5 years either side of 30.

    Once you hit 500 the attraction window is so large it becomes mostly irrelevant, and you’re judging more on aristocrical lineage and/or aristocrical diet.

    It’s only a few more years til 1000 (which usually turns out to be a very dull party with no surprise guests) and by that point you’re lucky to find anyone attractive.

    There’s obviously the old ‘hurr durr he’s over 2000 so he must be gay now’ stereotype, but as far as I can tell, attraction isn’t cyclical.

    Hope that helps!

    • IndiBrony@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      53
      ·
      1 year ago

      We’re generally talking humans here, not Time Lords.

      Makes it weird that the Doctor generally travels with people 1-2% of his age. Bloody cradle snatcher!

      • NABDad@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        23
        ·
        1 year ago

        They are kind of stuck. They have to find companions who don’t have children or responsibilities. The best majority of the people who land in those categories are younger folks.

    • grooving@lemmy.studio
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      30
      ·
      edit-2
      1 year ago

      Im 6 million years old now, and im attracted to literal planets.

      I remember at 2000 the hur due jokes. But honestly everyone’s giblets are so shriveled at that age (unless enhanced through mummification etc) that gender becomes irrelevant. Kind of comes down to who has the best stories at that point.

    • morgan423@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      10
      ·
      1 year ago

      Be really careful, I couldn’t tell which one exactly from your post, but as time goes on, you’re going to have to watch out either for people trying to drive a wooden stake through your heart, or chop your head off with a sword to steal your power. Just wanted to toss out a helpful FYI.

    • ryan@the.coolest.zone
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      edit-2
      1 year ago

      On the other side, as someone younger it’s hard to date people much older, as they start casually talking about what they did during various wars, or comparing the COVID pandemic to the black plague, and I’ve just got zero frame of reference to connect.

      Everyone much older I’ve met has been just delightful (I assume the rude ones eventually get murdered by their local townsfolk) but it’s just so hard to make that genuine connection when your life experiences are so different, you know?

    • thomasloven@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      25
      ·
      1 year ago

      As soon as I saw this post I jumped on xkcd. Glad I checked the comments before replying, or I would have made quite the fool of myself.

    • blindsight@beehaw.org
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      12
      ·
      1 year ago

      Alt text:

      The full analysis is of course much more complicated, but I can’t stay to talk about it because I have a date.

    • ForgetPrimacy@lemmygrad.ml
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      10
      ·
      1 year ago

      Since turning 30 I’ve been thinking about the half-your-age-plus-seven rule a lot more. It would feel creepy as fuck to date a 22 year old. Is this all in my head? It feels predatory to swipe right on anyone younger than 25

      • June@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        4
        ·
        1 year ago

        I’m about to turn 40, and 27 has proven to be too young for me. The folks I’ve had the most success with have been 30+.

        At 30, I’d think 25+ is the spot to be in.

      • Teal_Tiger@reddthat.com
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        3
        ·
        1 year ago

        LOL

        You realize that that “rule” is based on absolutely nothing, right? It’s just arbitrary nonsense that people who are terrified of disorder impose on themselves because rules give them a pleasant secure feeling even when the rule ridiculous :-D

        ‘creepy’ is a feeling. and like all feelings it is entirely in the eye of the beholder. ‘predatory’ is stupid fear-mongering bullshit. Certain TV personalities made tons of money scaring the fuck out of parents, and they did it by using the vivid violent imagery of vacuous metaphors like ‘predator’

        People in their 20s are perfectly capable adults. They are not harmed by consensual sex with people older than them. There is not a shred of evidence that folks over 30 are somehow dangerous or have magic brainwashing powers that they use for evil :-D

        So, yes, it’s all in your head. Your culture has taught you to fear something that is 100% harmless on every level.

      • gramathy@lemmy.ml
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        3
        ·
        1 year ago

        As a 37 year old 27+ seems reasonable to me, but it would be a lot more of a “maybe”

  • TIN@feddit.uk
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    80
    ·
    1 year ago

    I feel like there is a window that moves with you as you age. At 47 I find women attractive up to their early 50s, and down into their 30s.

    I mean dating attractive here. I’m not going to try and claim that a hot twenty something on the telly does nothing for me

    • antricfer@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      11
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      1 year ago

      I’m 55 I find young women very attractive but I wouldn’t have sex with them. Sex changes as you get older. It slows down and it’s more psychological than physical.

    • Asafum@feddit.nl
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      9
      ·
      1 year ago

      I was starting to question myself here lol everyone acting like a hot 20 year old is no longer hot when you’re older meanwhile I see someone I consider attractive they’re always attractive, I just won’t approach them if they’re young.

      The only way this doesn’t work is “upward” for me. 40s weren’t attractive when I was younger but they are now, but a hot 20 year old will always be hot to me (I think).

  • shadowSprite@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    67
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    1 year ago

    One of the men I’ve most respected and most trusted in my life told me once (at the time a teenager) that when he was in his 20s, women in their 20s were so hot and seeing a barely clothed young woman was so hot. But he said that now that he was in his 40s, women in his 40s were so hot and whenever he looked at a woman in her 20s all he could think of was that she could be his daughter and that he just felt protective and there was nothing hot or attractive about her.

    I’m a woman, but when I was in my teens and early 20s guys in their teens and early 20s seemed so attractive and anyone older was not it. Now that I’m in my early 30s I’m so attracted to men in their 30s and I look at teens and guys in their early 20s and they just seem like babies to me. I actually deal with a lot of young guys with my work and they’re all cool people and I love talking to them, but dating them? Ugh, no thank you. They were in elementary school (or younger) when I was graduating high school. So yeah, I think for a lot of people your goalposts move as you move, and that’s not a bad thing. I also am curious as to whether I’ll someday find 60 or 70 year old men hot, but I’ve got a long ways to go.

  • The Snark Urge@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    43
    ·
    1 year ago

    That’s what I hear happens. I’m sure the effect must stop working at some point, but so far I’m cruising.

    • Aussiemandeus@aussie.zoneOP
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      29
      ·
      1 year ago

      Yeah i appreciate that women my age stay attractive.

      I wonder what is the driving factor though.

      Familiarity with the look, perhaps.

      • oce 🐆@jlai.lu
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        24
        ·
        1 year ago

        I think it’s rather similar level of maturity and points of interest. Like I may find college students physically attractive, but there’s quite a maturity gap between students and people who have been working full time for a couple of years that can be off-putting to me.

      • Slotos@feddit.nl
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        7
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        1 year ago

        Self-conditioning.

        You like people you can have a meaningful interactions with, you are more likely to find sexual partners in that group, you fantasize about current or prospective partners, you end up building an attractiveness pattern that matches a certain age group.

      • The Snark Urge@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        5
        ·
        1 year ago

        Got to be an interaction with our wiring and social constructs. We’re mainly wired to get along with our tribe, after all. Makes sense for sexual preferences to naturally hew to social mores.

    • paddirn@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      7
      arrow-down
      2
      ·
      1 year ago

      “That’s what I love about these high school girls, man. I get older, they stay the same age.”

  • This is fine🔥🐶☕🔥@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    50
    arrow-down
    7
    ·
    1 year ago

    I’m 30 now and i will find women my age and up attractive, but 15 years ago a 35 year old women would never have been attractive to me.

    Lmao when I was 15 I was spanking the monkey to MILF porn. Thank you Deauxma and Nina Hartley.

  • Bell@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    42
    ·
    1 year ago

    Consider that “attractive” won’t always be skewed so heavily towards appearance. As I’ve gotten older attitude and personality matters at least as much as physical appearance. When I was 25 I was probably 90/10 (appearance/personality), now (55) I’m probably 40/60.

  • RBWells@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    31
    arrow-down
    2
    ·
    1 year ago

    I’m a lady, not a man. But yes as I have gotten older, my taste has too, I don’t know if that goes on forever but mid-50s and (sorry) 30 year old guys look like people who would be dating my kids, they look like kids to me.

    Certainly not MOST 50-60 year old guys look good to me but the ones who do, they sure do. Take care of your body, don’t get fat, do some exercise. You can look good at 30 without care but not 50, not 60.

  • 520@kbin.social
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    28
    ·
    1 year ago

    As the people we relate to change, so too do the things we find attractive in people. This will be a constantly changing thing

  • pickleprattle@midwest.social
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    21
    ·
    1 year ago

    Being in my 40s, I am relieved to say that I keep finding women attractive that are my age, and I look at people in their 20s as, well, kids. Even in my porn, I keep looking for women more my age.

    That’s true physically, but also emotionally. There is a humbling nearly all decent people seem to go through in their late 20s to 30s that at this point is a necessary point of bonding for me.

  • Chev@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    16
    ·
    1 year ago

    So far what I learned, is that many factors play into attraction. Looks are one. A big factor for me is also seeing someone as an equal. Fuck dates are fine with much younger or older ones but dating and a relationship, nop. I want to take the other one serious, I want to be in about the same stage of life experience, to have similar goals and similar pop culture references (tv shows, music, games that we played as kids). Seeing someone as an equal comes with similar age for me.

    • oce 🐆@jlai.lu
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      6
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      1 year ago

      Similar cultural references criteria would prevent dating someone who grew up in a different culture.

  • Venus [she/her]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    12
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    1 year ago

    All I know is that everybody says retirement homes are full of horny old people fucking all the time so maybe? Either that or old people just don’t care as much about attraction and are just happy all the parts still work

    My guess is as an adult you’ll always be attracted to women around the 25-35 range most but maybe once you get old you’ll also find some stuff to appreciate in grannies

  • HurlingDurling@lemm.ee
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    10
    ·
    1 year ago

    There isn’t a limit, your tastes on what you consider “attractive” will change over time. When one is young one only thinks on reproduction, and the older one gets, the more prevalent just having someone who you enjoy keeping you company.

    • GarbageShoot [he/him]@hexbear.net
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      4
      ·
      1 year ago

      When one is young one only thinks on reproduction

      Depending on your definition of “young”, what it actually is is that young people mainly think of fucking.

        • GarbageShoot [he/him]@hexbear.net
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          2
          ·
          1 year ago

          Speaking in terms of ultimate (evolutionary) causes, obviously, but on a proximate level of, for example, what the people in question actually think and feel, as well as the practical outcome given the accessibility of effective contraceptives, it has nearly nothing to do with reproduction.

  • down daemon@lemmy.ml
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    11
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    edit-2
    1 year ago

    just turned 40, i can def tell when someone in their 20s is hot, but I’d be really unlikely to date them. But, for example, meeting some rando at a bar and hooking up is different, as long as everyone is on board with the situation and consents. I’ve started finding older women attractive more than I would have when I was younger, it’s just hard to meet people at this age and covid wasted my late 30s doing nothing

  • itsathursday@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    9
    ·
    1 year ago

    I’d imagine you accept what is realistically available to you. You’d not really have anything in common with people outside a certain window so as you age these “older” people are just your peers from a similar vintage so to speak so a lot of things make sense and are common between you and each year they just happen to be a year older…

    • RBWells@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      1 year ago

      I’m pretty sure for me it’s just that generational age differences squick me out, so when I was young, guys old enough to be my dad? EEW! But now it’s also guys young enough to be my kids, EEW!

      I do also agree about the maturity level, but that’s not enough different between adults, a 35 year old can be about the same mental maturity as a 60 year old, I can talk so easily to my grown kids and their boyfriend/girlfriends/spouses, they are adults. But I literally don’t see people that age as sexy.